If you accept that a partner will come with problems, one approach is to consider that when choosing a partner you are also choosing a set of problems. Of course you should expect your partner to grow and some of these problems to be minimized or handled but partners need to accept the good and the bad, and work with that. In a positive way!
But I never quite know how to make it happen. Although I’m a friendly person, I’m definitely on the shy side about making the first move. All you braver ladies out there who can do it, I salute you. But for those of us that are a little more reserved, how do you get the guys to come to you?
This article is perfect…evn i m an Asian girl and i am naturally feminine……..that cutness,shyness,kindness,coyness is in build in me and for which i am loved by many. Evn though i am not in relationship but i am in search for a manly boy……and for those girls who are disagreeing let me tell u either you are frustated by yourself or jealous of other that you don’t have that femininty……bcoz this is wat the boys love the most
The researchers were floored and expect the finding to prompt full “reconsideration of the role of physical affection and its meaning for each gender in longer-term relationships.” Says Julia Heiman, director of the Kinsey Institute and the study leader, “People really are so willing to accept stereotypes of male promiscuity and inability to commit. That is the problem with stereotyping: It tends not to be ‘men in their early 20s’; it tends to be ‘all men.’ It’s just that men are more complicated than that.”
Get over your fear of rejection. The fear of rejection can be a powerful emotion that prevents you from putting yourself out there and finding a man. Rejection can cause someone physical and emotional pain, and past experiences may shape how you see your current relationships in a negative way.[15] To reduce fears of rejection, make sure you aren’t investing too much emotionally into one moment. Another way to get over the fear of rejection is to desensitize yourself to it over time. That is, introduce yourself to many men and get used to rejection occasionally. Gradual exposure is a common treatment for people who have phobias or people with anxiety.[16]
The paragraphs themselves have more compelling information, but those pink headings are odd and repetitive, and only address one aspect of how NOT to attract men, instead of how to attract them. Or are you just desperate to show us how annoying desperation is? This post is not as coherent as most of the others I’ve seen here so far.
There you are at the bar, in class, or at the grocery store. He’s 10 feet from you watching the game, studying Chaucer, or picking up canned tuna. After you give the 3-5 second glance over to him, coupled with your adorable smile, you then go back to your previous activity.
One of those very first steps of courtship, dating, and mating is getting noticed by a potential lover. Sometimes, however, those first steps are the most difficult. How do you get that hot guy at the bar to come over and say hello? How do you get the cute gal at the coffee shop to smile and chat? Many people struggle with those questions – and miss potential romance as a result.
The quickest solution to finding a man really is to focus on handling the other areas of your life and having a lifestyle that you really enjoy. When you do this, you’ put yourself in control of your own happiness and will effortlessly attract great men into your life.
So if you’re trying to catch the attention of a typical guy *a large percentage of men have normal or high production of testosterone even though the overall average testosterone levels have dropped significantly in American men over the last 50 years*, chances are, he’d love you if your behavior is more feminine, cute and girly! [Read: Do guys prefer dating cute, shy girls over other girls?]
But many women have a difficult time harnessing the power of what relationship expert, Kara Oh, refers to in her highly recommended guide, Men Made Easy, as feminine grace. And even if you do realize how to use your own femininity to attract men, not understanding what men want and how they think will leave you utterly confused and feeling hopeless that you’ll never find “the one”.
There are guys putting this stuff in books and making lots of money, but their books are not nearly as entertaining nor do they have the ring of truth that you have managed to convey. As an older woman back in the dating scene, all I can say is thanks!!!
“A practical guide to understanding a man’s point of view about love and romance and how a woman can optimize self-esteem and integrity to find the love she deserves.” (Judith Orloff, MD, New York Times best-selling author of Emotional Freedom)
Varely-you were honest and upfront, and unfortunately not many guys can handle it. I think dating is hit or miss. Even if you have chemistry with a guy it doesn’t mean anything will come of the relationship. He might not be interested. It’s all about taking chances, and you did, so that’s a good thing. And since you’re not looking for anything serious (or even if you were) – I’d tell you the same thing – on to the next, and forget that guy! XO
I also don’t follow what you mean by ‘seeking a partner of equal value’. The fact that most women value men who are violent, abusive, and dysfunctional thugs—or weak, effeminate metrosexual types—illustrates how little most of them value masculinity at all.
Finally, always look polished. Wear that bright nail polish on your toes – maybe a luminous hot pink, a blazing orange, or a bright torquoise. Put on those beautiful bracelets that give off a pleasant sound when you gesture with your hands. I’m serious… men ache for these little touches of femininity.
High self-esteem doesn’t just happen without behavioral change too. Therefore, it requires acting and trying out the behaviors of a high self-esteem individual. “Faking it until you make it” is a real and powerful phenomenon. So, practicing and acting can actually fix the core problem as well.
I am an ASIAN woman f, love it not because of anything, love that comes from habit, from the eye to the brain and the mind to the heart, that true love is pure in mind and heart, it is a gift, because it raised an expectation of love and sacrifice, and if do not be afraid to sacrifice love romance, and believe me mate is actually a reflection jiwa.per confident love yourself, do not be hung with the hard work of others, success with hard work and effort, not the passenger name.
Northwestern University psychologists Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel recently arranged a speed-dating event for 163 university guys and gals and had them indicate beforehand what they wanted in a mate: attractiveness, earning potential, or personality qualities. The men—no surprise—overwhelmingly said they wanted looks. But when they got to the table something changed. Eastwick and Finkel discovered that pre-event ideals failed to predict a person’s true romantic interests.

Practice the Golden Rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. You want him to ask you out or take you out or do whatever else for you? You should be equally willing, and don’t wait for or expect him to do it first. Good men respect a person who applies the same rules to themself that they would apply to a man.
I have been known to “own my space” by plopping on the floor in the midst of hundreds of commuters, laptop in lap, typing away obliviously. Savvy, what say you to this? Sure way to never get a good guy, or excusable city dweller behavior ?
When it comes to true demonstrations of masculine energy and the code it lives by, the concept of honor is practically inseparable from the ideal. Whether it’s warriors on the battlefield or symbolic “warriors” on the playing field, having your partner’s back is the difference between winning and losing or even life and death. A man has got to trust that you’re on his team and have his back, otherwise, he will never commit.
Men can sense your vibe and you don’t have to say anything to make it come across; in fact, the less you “try” to “prove” what a good mood you are in and the more you focus on actually being in a good mood, the better off you will be.
Verely; what you did wrong telling this guy you liked him is you were too easy. You have to find a way to attract a man to you, by being friendly, flirtatious maybe, but you don’t just give yourself to him.
The last thing you want to happen is miss out on the opportunity to take advantage of the situation when a guy want to ask you out but is scared out of his wits to do it. Here you will find ways to tell he is trying to ask you out. Just keep it a secret because if he ever finds out he’ll be furious. Keep on reading to get what you need to stay one step in front of him.
There’s plenty of resources online about improving your sex life, so I’m not going to get into it here. All I’ll say is that loving sex and loving sex with him helps a relationship a lot, and is something that shouldn’t be ignored.
Fidelity is an absolute must. In fact, men want a woman who does not have a “roaming eye” and who can wholeheartedly commit to the relationship. Many may define commitment as fidelity plus the willingness to work on the relationship — even when the going gets tough. Women think that all men want is sex, and that men will leave a relationship for the next prettier face. Women think men cannot be trusted to be faithful. Women believe men do not want to work on a relationship, and that when the going gets tough, they run.
A really good friend of mine is the more ‘agressive and dominant’ type, and I noticed that attractive guys were going after her. I was a bit envious at first, but then I found out they were just using her. There is this ONE guy who doesn’t have much testosterone, but he truly loves and cares about her.
But to call this desire universal is to ignore a great deal of competing information. While men in developed societies go numb for sinuous curves, those in many developing countries surrender to a larger, more parallel contour. Plumpness may be a sign of poor health in the West, but elsewhere it’s a sign that a woman has access to money and food. Some cultures even prefer a body type that health experts consider clinically overweight. And when a man changes culture, he adjusts his preferred measurements accordingly.
While some of your previous relationships may have proven otherwise, the truth is men are natural givers. Yes, that’s right. They want to give, they want to provide, and they want to make you happy. What they don’t want is to be bossed around and told what to do.
If you are single and available you want to tell everyone you know and like that you are ready and looking for a great man. But make sure to tell them what kind of guy you are looking for. Otherwise they may set you up with their unemployed, neighbor who has commitment issues.
Be sure to attract a decent guy though. It pains me to see a decent girl ending up with a worthless man. Women can do so much better than settle down with a worthless man. Women are independent and they can do their own thing. We don’t need a worthless man in our lives. We need a man that will complement us. We need a man that would go the extra mile just to make ends meet. We want a partner for life, not a liability. Let’s take a stand for all the independent women in the world. They deserve better men.