If you’re asking yourself ‘Well, how do I attract men?’ all the time, that’s a sign of insecurity as well. When a woman walks and talks with confidence, men are attracted instantly. A woman that is confident knows what she is comfortable with, and will strive towards making other people feel good about themselves. She isn’t focused on making herself look amazing, while at the same time undermining her partner. She also takes the first step, if her partner is hesitant. And if you’re insecure about something, believe that a man can smell it from the distance. He can see it in your eyes, your gestures, and your voice. So lose the inhibitions and be confident in yourself and your achievements, and the way you’re going to do this is by always keeping in mind the positive and good things you have in your life.
It’s a fact of life: men and human beings are visual creatures. There are certain things a man is going to respond to whether he wants to or not. I’m only giving you this information to help you… not to offend or be rude, so please
Trust builds slowly over time. Once that trust is broken (especially when you get cheated on) it takes even longer to rebuild. Nothing will solve the situation short term. It’s going to take time for you to trust again.
I’ve been absolutely blessed to have been watching Rachael Ray when Matt was a guest on the show. I signed up for emails the same hour his segment finished airing. Though I never signed up for the thorough and elaborate step by step process, I’ve learned quite a bit about myself as well as how others and men perceive me. After leaving my husband of 6 years (not long but long enough), I had men asking me out one after the other. Six guys in a four week period wanted to date ME! ME, of all people. I declined five out of the six because I didn’t NEED a man, nor every date possible. The only one I didn’t decline is such a wonderful, caring, and handsome 😉 man that values me. For once, I’ve found someone that brings as much to the table as I do. I was a very clingy, disgustingly desperate feeling woman in the beginning, but I’ve discovered that I AM VALUABLE just as I am. I’m a slightly heavy woman, not obese, but curvy, and I’m with the most fit, trim, gorgeous, kindhearted, and romantic man I’ve ever met. He’s nearly straight from a romance novel. If I hadn’t found you, Matt, I’m sure I would still be the same lonely and needy woman that I once was. Thank you for everything.
To another mans comment above I agree NO man wants to date some woman who is always arguing why are u even thinking about stereotype this and that blah blah blah” oh plz shut UUUPPP!!!! I giggled a little when he said Asian women lol but who cares! Don’t get so offended they are very cute and sweet is that bad to point it out ?
I feel the same goes for women to men, and is a secret rarely discussed on these websites that make a man go crazy for a girl. If I am not feeling attractive/masculine, it lowers my attraction for others & makes dating, love, and sex less fulfilling. The girls who I have been most attracted to know how to project their passion towards a man’s masculinity, virility, and sexiness– and in turn, men feed off that and increases his overall attraction to her.
This is a brilliant article, thank you. My whole life I had plenty of male attention I took for granted until a couple of years ago – I was broken hearted after a break up. Ever since then, all the male attention I previously thought I would always have completely evaporated. I realise from this article that I lost the natural happy and feminine things I used to do as I lost touch with myself a little. I used to walk slower, take my time with things, wear jewellery that would give that tinkle etc. Since my break up, I filled the void with work and projects and as a result am rushing around everywhere, thinking business. Although I take care of my appearance, I miss the little touches as always thinking about how to best utilise my time, to fill it up so I don’t spend time dwelling on the past, rather than taking and owning my time. Thank you so much for making me realise what it is so clearly. This article is a blessing.
Preening goes back to taking up your space – sort of, but it’s a highly female thing to do. Men truly love seeing a woman preen a little, not in an overly obvious or vulgar way. Ever. Good preening requires subtlety. No need to overdo it. You’re simply “smoothing your feathers.” Indeed, preening gets to the heart of flirting and in creating an aura of mystique.
Here’s a simple foolproof test: if it feels like you have to “fight” for your relationship, or it feels like you’re constantly battling to keep your relationship on track – that’s a strong sing you’re not compatible with each other.
I have heard Matthew Hussey speak on the radio and I was looking forward to reading his book, bu I was dissapointed to learn that after every chapter I had to sign in to the websiteand become a paid member in order to look t th video that accompanied each chapter……I felt thi was more of a pay as you go long “help book” than anyhing else…….I was extremely dissapointed and expected more from the author…….
“Men seemed to have a heightened sense of the precariousness of the male gender role,” says University of South Florida psychologist Jennifer Bosson, the paper’s lead author. “We haven’t found many men willing to admit that my manhood is often in question, but when you ask men in general if manhood is something that’s easy to lose and hard to attain, they agree that’s the case.” Or, as the Kinsey Institute’s Julia Heiman puts it: “Heterosexual men have a little trouble saying they really like kissing and cuddling.”
“There’s an interesting and complex relationship between how committed a man is and how actively he’ll try to avoid tempting sexual alternatives,” says Maner. “As one example: Men sometimes automatically avert their gaze from tempting alternatives, and they do so without even having to think about it.” Maybe that indifference some men show in the presence of attractive women on New York City sidewalks isn’t affected at all. Maybe it’s affection remembered.
Breaking up is hard to do, but with your favorite ice cream, a warm blanket, and a few of the best breakup songs on the radio, it can be just a little bit better. We’ve compiled a list of some of our favorite cry-your-eyes-out, sing-through-the-pain songs to get you back out there in the dating pool.
The study seemed to confirm every stereotype anyone ever held about what men want (for the purposes of this article, what heterosexual men want). We want women. Now, please—although tonight will do. At worst tomorrow. We want them like that old Army poster with the finger pointing outward. We want you. We want you like we’re all Uncle Sam, and dammit if the Germans aren’t at it again. Pack up the lab equipment, please, shut off the lights, and move on to more important behavioral studies. Like finding out who drinks “lots of pulp” Tropicana.
Men want no manipulation of any kind. They do not want to have to read their partner’s mind or try to interpret signals. They do not want to be forced to move faster in a relationship than they are ready. They do not want to be manipulated into taking all the blame for things gone wrong. They do not want to be on the receiving end of game playing. Women think men want little or no communication, and the only way to get needs met is through manipulation. Women think men either need or want to be reminded that the relationship needs to move forward. Women think men don’t want or value praise and acknowledgment, and so tend to only verbalize criticism.
If you wanted an Alaskan Salmon, throwing your fishing line into the Gulf of Mexico probably isn’t going to land you the desired prize. I’m not saying you won’t land a fish, you probably will. It’s just that it won’t be the fish you are looking for.
Men can sense your vibe and you don’t have to say anything to make it come across; in fact, the less you “try” to “prove” what a good mood you are in and the more you focus on actually being in a good mood, the better off you will be.
A downside: the book directs you to online videos for more “secrets” which are really just teasers which lead you to another video they want you to pay for. I can see this as being an endless goose chase designed to keep you hooked & shelling out money while learning very little. I’d have more respect for the author & brand if they took a less scam-like approach. The video they want you to buy has a long intro to sell it which does the classic “play on women’s insecurities & promise grand secrets to solve all of their romance problems in a matter of days” approach, one which many dating gurus do. I find it borderline insulting & I naturally expect it to under-deliver with super obvious “insight” repeated ad nauseam just as the rest seem to. This approach is unfortunate & detracts from a brand that has the potential to be more positive & actually useful, as opposed to the insulting junk I described at the outset.
When someone tells you that the best way to attract someone is by being yourself, well, they’re not entirely right. All of us change all the time. And not every change that we see in ourselves may be in the right direction.
5. Looks don’t matter. I know it sounds corny but It isn’t the outside that matters, it’s the inside, but since I don’t take into account the physical attributes that someone doesn’t have control over then neither should my partner.
Closed Minded women bother me. They know what they know and really couldn’t care a spit about a differing opinion. I was on a date one time with this gal who was Persian, we were having a great time. Then I told her about a friend of mine who is Iranian and as soon as I said what region she was from; culturally divisive spew erupted from this girl’s mouth. I couldn’t believe it! No common ground could be reached, she was beside herself just denigrating my friend’s regional culture… I couldn’t get over it, our date ended shortly there after. Closed Mindedness and self imposed ignorance are two bad tastes that were never made to go together.
I enjoyed this hub tremendously, as it reminds me of the importance of confidence in the dating scene and in other circumstances. You have great ideas of the subtle things women can do to get the attention of men. Some women are naturals. but others must work at it. Thanks for sharing your ideas, Pinning hub. Blessings, Audrey
Therefore, men want to be successful in everything they do. It’s the reason they’re competitive at sports. It’s the reason they work long hours, sometimes at the expense of time with the family. It’s the reason they want to be your protector, provider, and the best lover you’ve ever had.
Don’t be afraid to make a move. Let’s be real: a good man doesn’t desperately need any person; he would like to meet a good person. If he’s a good man, he will appreciate the compliment to his attractiveness, at the very least. But remember that compliments are usually given to acquaintances – people who are intimate usually have a more honest connection, with playful teasing and banter. Think of good relationships between brothers and sisters, parents and children, especially couples – they’re always joking, laughing, teasing, flirting in a positive way. A woman who is always complimenting may simply be boring and look desperate. Even if you are old-fashioned and never want to be the woman who asks a man for a date, you can still go out of your way to talk to him, and arrange to be with him. Don’t overdo this, however; unless he is already attracted to you before the encounter, the more obvious it is that you’ve put a ton of time into the encounter without his direct encouragement, the more desperate and less attractive you look. Work on building attraction first.
A regular man who isn’t suffering from low testosterone would always find a feminine woman more attractive than a woman who thinks femininity is overrated and displays traits that are traditionally considered manly.
If a guy feels good while he’s around you, he’s going to be interested in you! He’s going to want to spend more time with you, and he’s going to show more enthusiasm for hanging out, getting closer and getting to know you better.
So if you want to attract a man and make him desire you, you just need to get his attention the right way. And the rest, as they say, is history! [Read: 22 ways to get a guy’s attention in any circumstance]
The researchers also found that women were willing to hop into bed too—a full 24 percent—if the man was good-looking enough. Another re-creation of the original experiment, conducted by Michigan psychologist Terri Conley, discovered similar behavioral shifts. She reports in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology that two in five women accept a proposition if they think the man will be good enough in bed.
The trick to attracting men is to make sure you value all the other areas of your life (for example your job, your family, your friends, your hobbies, etc) just as highly as you value having a man in your life.
What women think men want from them often causes women to have resentment and anger toward men, and feel hopeless about ever developing a wonderful, warm, romantic partnership. What men think women want from them often causes them much of the same feelings and frustration. The sad part is that it does not have to be this way, if only we would realize that both men and women are human beings first and pretty much want the same thing. But, you don’t have to take my word for this. I asked a number of men and women who are actively involved in personal growth and development what they want from a partner in order to build a great relationship. You will find their answers unexpected.
Don’t change anything. You’re now in the honeymoon period, where you have some time to get used to each other. This is the time that you do the cute things of the relationship. Come up with a song together that you can label as “Our song.” Some great ones can be “I could not ask for more” by Edwin McCain, “Something Coming Over”, by O.A.R., “Breathing”, by Lifehouse, “Amazed”, by Lonestar. These are only examples, you can choose yourself, this is just a guide for what you should look for. Also, if you have a band you both mutually are really into, try to choose a song by that band. Make sure to read the lyrics and understand the song before you pick though. Some songs can be deceiving with their meanings.
I think I may just be a little clingy to my boyfriend lately. My bf and I have bn together for 2years now. Being in a long-distance relationship we have naturally always wanted 2 feel like we are together all the time, we spend most, if not all, of our free time chatting online or watchng same movies at the same time etc.
I loved this I have been doing allot of research on how to people have that certain quality that attracts men and think this is the most helpful. Many websites make you watch an hour long video to find out in the end that you have to pay money for the real secrets which is not right. This gives you simple steps with an effect. Thanks for some great tips! 🙂
Only problem is, we’re on Earth. What the research revealed to those on this planet is that within the male gender the question is far from settled. Envisioning a mate having acrobatic sex with a stranger made only about a quarter of Dutch and German men more upset than picturing her in love with the fellow, and about half of Americans responded the same way.
I have met many men who are looking for that brilliant, kind, accomplished size 4 when they are fat, unemployed (or underemployed),uneducated misogynists. In my dating profiles I have had to ask men not to contact me if they were deficient in employment, physical attributes, or wealth. Who are the women who like that sort of male?
The reason I am saying to you this is because when you compare yourself, all you do is make yourself feel miserable and frustrated. The best thing to do is be your best self and focus on things you can control and improve upon. This will make you feel good.
And do not , under ANY circumstances order directly from his “empire’s” site ! His company illegally keeps your payment method on file and you WILL start getting random fraudulent charges for his other crap, “coaching” bs and all of his other nonsense , while entertaining , is as useless as this book .
Great article! I totally agree. The cuteness of a woman can tame a man’s heart and lust to find other women out there, but of course beeing sexy too. To those women that disagree with this article, stop beeing so dominant. Men are physically and etc. stronger than us women, they dont need a tougher spouse to live with, let them be the men and u be the woman a.k.a queen/princess. Are how is that? Politeness, funny, shyness, cuteness, sexyness. If u want to be the stronger spouse in the relationship, they will surely not stay long with u since it is in their nature that they are the ones who should feel masculine and strong and have responsibilities to protect and love his gf/wife. They want to feel that they are wanted, so let them lead and u as woman relax and enjoy. (Not talking bout the cooking and cleanin though lol)
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Matthew Hussey has coached thousands of high-powered CEOs, showing them how to develop confidence and build relationships that translate into professional success. Many of Matthew’s male clients pressed him for advice on how to apply his winning strategies not to just get the job, but how to get the girl. As his reputation grew, Hussey was approached by more and more women, eager to hear what he had learned about the male perspective on love and romance.
As a general rule of thumb, if your walk has become a waddle, you’ve gone too far. If you have no other problems and yet walking or standing hurts your joints or back, you may be too fat to be attractive to most men (and nobody is saying you have to be).