In his book, Get the Guy, Matthew Hussey—Cosmopolitan columnist, Today show dating expert, motivational speaker, relationship guru, and matchmaker—reveals the secrets of the male mind and the fundamentals of dating and mating for a proven, revolutionary approach to help women to find lasting love.
The study seemed to confirm every stereotype anyone ever held about what men want (for the purposes of this article, what heterosexual men want). We want women. Now, please—although tonight will do. At worst tomorrow. We want them like that old Army poster with the finger pointing outward. We want you. We want you like we’re all Uncle Sam, and dammit if the Germans aren’t at it again. Pack up the lab equipment, please, shut off the lights, and move on to more important behavioral studies. Like finding out who drinks “lots of pulp” Tropicana.
Omg! omg! Can’t believe this! Evrythng worked on the first time itself! He was away for the weekend with his buddies n I was all alone! I gave him his space n happily talked to him when he returned, dressed cute for the evening n he’s dying to spend the next weekend with me! Never ever happened in 3 yrs! Thanks a ton!
Unfortunately, you cannot and should not force anyone to do something that they do not wish to do. You can try to get to know this man better by spending more time with him; perhaps he will eventually grow to like you. If he really is not interested in you, however, it might be healthier for you to move on to a different man.
Hi FlourishAnyway. Thank you for sharing the hub! I’m happy that you enjoyed that particular section–about owning your space. It really does pay off where men are concerned, but I will say that sometimes some “petty” women will get a little catty about it…but that’s there problem and not ours. As always, I appreciate your insight about the positive and confident signals we send out.
Another way to practice excellent body language is to have awareness of your hands. Are they relaxed, or are they clenched? Tense hands indicate a closed, stubborn, or unhappy personality. Women who seem inflexible make men crazy, and not in a good way. However, if your palms are open and your wrists exposed, this small thing projects a more welcoming aura. In other words, an aura of calmness draws men toward you. Women too, are attracted to men who are relaxed and have who an easy way about them. In fact, everyone is drawn to people whose body language is quietly confident, reassuring and warm.
The result: She met tons of smart, funny and fascinating… women. “Don’t get me wrong,” says Marla. “I’m really glad I did all of that stuff. I made some wonderful friends and expanded my horizons. My new pursuits nourished my soul, but I have to say they did zip for my love life.”
I don’t know about you guys, but I hardly ever meet guys in regular life situations. You may have noticed that most of the dating escapades I tell you about are of the online persuasion. Which is fine, and I’ll continue to try that angle, but it would be nice once in a while to just meet a guy the old-fashioned way, right? (By old-fashioned I mean like, at a bar. Not an arranged marriage or anything.)
Volunteer for an LGBTQ organization or nonprofit. Volunteering for an LGBTQ organization will allow you to meet other gay men that hold similar beliefs and have similar passions for activism. This is also a great way to network with other gay people in your area. Try to tap into different circles of friends so you can find other eligible gay men.
As you hold your grocery basket in one hand, slowly slide your other hand through your hair, give it a couple of tussles, and then let it slowly drizzle from the nape of your neck down to the collar bone. The sexiness and playfulness of your hair, combined with the tenderness of your neck will kick in a few mating chemicals inside of him that will ignite his hunt mode.
The key to a great first date is picking a fun, inexpensive, casual activity that allows you to talk but also keeps you busy. We’ve come up with 50 fun first date ideas for you and 50 gentlemen–or maybe just you and Adam Sandler.
Respected relationship expert Dr. Pat Allen suggests using red lipstick, since our 4-legged primate ancestors once attracted their male counterparts with their swollen vulvas. Now that we are on 2 legs, parts are, well… quite hidden, so evolution has passed the mating magnet to another pair of exposed lips.
Don’t change anything. You’re now in the honeymoon period, where you have some time to get used to each other. This is the time that you do the cute things of the relationship. Come up with a song together that you can label as “Our song.” Some great ones can be “I could not ask for more” by Edwin McCain, “Something Coming Over”, by O.A.R., “Breathing”, by Lifehouse, “Amazed”, by Lonestar. These are only examples, you can choose yourself, this is just a guide for what you should look for. Also, if you have a band you both mutually are really into, try to choose a song by that band. Make sure to read the lyrics and understand the song before you pick though. Some songs can be deceiving with their meanings.
Perfume is actually something that a lot of women over do. Most men do not like very strong perfume. You’re better off sticking with something very light and being very conservative with how much you spray.
She is smiling. Nothing is sexier than a woman who feels sufficiently good about herself to smile at the people she’s interacting with, whether it’s her friends, a baby or the waiter. Life is too short to be taken seriously.
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2) Work – People who work together tend to share many common bonds and interests. Part of this is because working together allows individuals to get to know each other and establish a base line friendship before moving into a relationship.
Be mysterious. A huge part of attracting men is letting them figure you out. Don’t talk his ear off about every detail of your life or your feelings. Carefully think about what you say and don’t fill the conversation with idle gabbing. Also, don’t make yourself available all the time. Allow him to wonder where you are and what you’re doing.
3. Music Clubs. Next Saturday night take a bunch of your girlfriends to a nightclub that hosts local bands. You’ll find them right up on stage: clusters of men, pouring their hearts out, trying to impress you. But don’t get too seduced by musical talent. Tortured artists are dazzling on stage, but can be a drag in real life. On the other hand, a nice middle manager (during the day) indulging in some innocent rock-star fantasies (by night) could be just the ticket. The big drawback of music clubs, of course, is that the noise level can make it hard to hold a conversation. But if you say, “Hey, fantastic set!” he’ll hear you.
A man prefers a partner who can understand him, someone he can lean on and trust her opinion. Someone he can engage with in an intellectual discussion. Opinionated and organised female thinker will definitely gain not just his affection but also his respect.
As I say in point 5 of the article, the best relationships are a trade among individuals of relatively equal value. So, the men who are looking for a valuable female, without being a valuable male, are indeed asking too much and giving too little. That may fool some people in the short-term, but it is not a successful strategy to find a satisfying relationship.
Don’t be hasty. Lean in slowly and close your eyes. Go almost completely all the way to her lips, and wait for her to meet you there. Don’t go all the way, this might scare her off. Give her some room and time to make the decision. Go about 85-90% of the way.
Having been married for the best part of two decades – I now find myself single again at the age of 46. After a bad internet dating experience, I decided to visit the London School of Attraction for some tips. My big take-away from it was that women need to approach to men and not just wait to be discovered.
Hello every one,my name is tricia,my boyfriend was not attracted to me but he was to other girls,i love him so much and didn’t want to loose him,so i cast a good luck charm on the both of us through the help of prophet Rukevwe and today our relationship is stronger than ever,if you have tried everything and non worked out,please contact firstname.lastname@example.org he surely can solve any problem,life is too short to be wasting time on advice we already know about.No offence
This article sucks! “Contrary to popular belief, don’t be yourself. Evolve.” What is so wrong with being yourself?! Women and men need to be authentically themselves. It is so beautiful when you find someone who loves and cares about you because you are you. That is what love is, not some bullshit circus show.
Male stereotypes fail to take into account the importance of what might be called a commitment continuum. At one end are married men, at the other are gigolos, with all shades of monogamous and polygamous moderation in between. The oversight helps perpetuate misunderstandings of what men want.
This is sexist. It’s generalising feminists aswell as women and men in general. People have preferences, people should using biology as an excuse to pidgeon hole. Women should be and wear whatever they want to. To all the men saying women should dress a certain way to suit you I say that maybe you need to broaden your perception on what you consider attractive, everyone should. It is the media that tells you what is attractive, preferences are okay but it is not okay to throw around insults because people do not fit your narrow standards of beauty.
Preening goes back to taking up your space – sort of, but it’s a highly female thing to do. Men truly love seeing a woman preen a little, not in an overly obvious or vulgar way. Ever. Good preening requires subtlety. No need to overdo it. You’re simply “smoothing your feathers.” Indeed, preening gets to the heart of flirting and in creating an aura of mystique.
Speaking from 38+ years of marriage … I want a woman who takes care of herself for me. The same as I take care of myself for her. A woman who lets herself go once she has landed her man is saying “I’m in this for me alone”. Of course the reverse is true, a man who does not take care of himself for his woman is just as guilty. Ladies and Gentlemen, successful relationships are not 50% / 50% deals, they are 100% / 100% deals. Be committed to giving your 100% all the time.
The original movie starred Mel Gibson as a marketing exec who suddenly has the ability to hear what women are thinking after a freak accident. In the remake, the roles are reversed, with Henson playing sports agent who has been constantly boxed out by her male colleagues. When she gains the power to hear men’s thoughts, she is able to shift the paradigm to her advantage as she races to sign the NBA’s next superstar.
So change often, become the dream girl you fantasize about in your head, and be the girl you really want to be. And life will turn out to be so much better for you, be it about men, work, friends or anything else.
Understanding men and their need to be successful is key to keeping a man around. Compliment him and find ways to make him feel successful in everything he does, and he’ll reward you through loyalty, love, passion, and romance.
I have been crazy about this older guy that I work with for years.First as a subordinate, now as a colleague. We have finally had an intimate moment that he called “something significant” however, we have not had sex. Problem is, I’ve been flirting, listening and being supportive as a friend but inside I’m going crazy with wanting him. He has recently broken up with a girlfriend and I know he is not ready for another relationship…last thing I want is to be the rebound girl. He has admitted that he is physically attracted to me and we have spoken about being lovers…only problem is, I don’t just want him in my bed, I want to be in his heart as well. I feel like I’m deceiving him because I told him I’m okay with just being lovers and that I will not expect any more than that. But he holds my heart already and I am dying not being able to show him how I really feel about him. As much as I want him physically, I want him to love me back as much as I love him. This is such a mess because I know that if I was to say no to being intimate with him now, I am making a liar of myself. Any advise?
Well, with five brothers in your life, some of this stuff might seem “unique”….but it’s really quite universal—though less so nowadays. However, it’s all great fun! Here’s to our feminine side. Nice to have you stop by Jewels. (Great name)
Many women treat men in ways that diminish their egos, making them feel inadequate. Men would rather have more praise, more acknowledgment of what they do right, and more acknowledgment that they are great guys who are loved and appreciated. Women think men do not need them, and do not value their opinion, their support, or their praise. Women also think men do not care about many things that are important to women, which is why they criticize. Criticism can be a way to verbalize resentment.
Start with innocent touches and be very nonchalant and natural when you do it. For example, if you are sitting next to each other, you could kind of inch a tiny bit closer to him and have your leg against his leg and don’t say a word about it, just enjoy the moment. Or you could casually touch his thigh, as if it’s the most normal thing in the world.
There’s plenty of resources online about improving your sex life, so I’m not going to get into it here. All I’ll say is that loving sex and loving sex with him helps a relationship a lot, and is something that shouldn’t be ignored.
Initially, you might not feel confident with the idea of taking up any extra space, but it doesn’t really matter—just act like you do anyway. Eventually your discomfort will disappear. Just keep your chin up, and most people will not suspect your anxiety. In any event, it is natural to feel a bit of shyness in taking up your given space when you first begin practicing this important art of attraction. The good news is, in time you won’t even remember why your once felt any nervousness about owning your space. So begin now. I encourage you to first learn to appreciating any small, but pleasurable detail about your surroundings—the crispness in the air, the smell of herbs in your food, the beauty of a clear sky, whether you are surrounded by a plethora of people or none at all.
Every man produces testosterone, a sexual hormone, in his testes. And women produce a small amount of testosterone in their ovaries. The more testosterone a man produces, the more manly he looks and the more sexually virile he is. His facial features appear manlier, his jaws are wider and more chiseled and his voice is deeper.
My boyfriend also used to obssess over me a lot but that has changed, he seems to have gotten himself a life and goes out more often. I feel like I’m the clingy gf left behind. How do I stop this before I drive my bf away?