She is drunk. Whether it’s a bar, club or a dinner party, I’m not into a woman who feels the need to get sloshed in order to have a good time or feel confident around guys. The best indicator of whether there is a real connection is when both people are sober and able to connect to each other based on their authentic selves. Meeting while drunk just adds another social mask that will eventually come off anyways.
► Wit and humour: The ability to make another person laugh is a gift. That gift is indeed one of the most prized qualities in a woman that a man seeks. It fills him with happiness and energy. Being witty emphasises quick thinking capabilities, which in turn alludes to intelligence.
Women who are willing to hide or detach from their real selves in order to bag a man often seem to believe that the right guy will give them a sense of identity and self-confidence. This is backward. Looking for love before developing a strong sense of self is like trying to find the mate of a shoe you’ve never seen.
Sometimes men lie to women because they feel telling the truth will cause you to freak out and go into emotional overload which men aren’t equipped to handle. For example, if you constantly question where he’s at or who he is with, then he will tend to lie because it’s easier (and less scary) than having you potentially get upset or unload on him over nothing.
I’m a guy and I just don’t get a few girls girls who’ve commented here! Every time a guy says something truthful (in this case, the author), and it makes you feel insecure, you just jump down his throat and try to force him to say he’s wrong! 🙂
Knee, C. R., Patrick, H., Vietor, N. A., & Neighbors, C. (2004). Implicit theories of relationships: Moderators of the link between conflict and commitment. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 30, 617-628.
Being clean is obviously important and goes without saying in terms of smelling good; drenching yourself in perfume is not. One thing most men agree upon is that women’s hair normally smells amazing from all the shampoo products and stuff. The point is less is more.
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Frankly, women are still unsure what attracts men to them. Hot bodies and gorgeous faces are in, but getting the right man is still a difficult task at hand. But if the above thesis is right, then there isn’t much left to do other than be youself!!! 🙂
Play hard to get. The worst thing you can do is to smother a guy or appear desperate. Men are attracted to the thrill of the chase, so if you’re chasing after him, you’re taking away the challenge. Keep it low-key and keep him on the edge of his seat. Maintain your composure. Your outward indifference may make him want you more.
Joe Amoia, The Smarter Dating Guy, is the founder and creator of Smarter Dating For Women. For more information visit him online at www.SmarterDatingForWomen.com and while you’re there make sure to sign up for the FR*EE 5 day mini e-course: The 5 Biggest Mistakes Women Make in Dating
Whether it’s going out with friends and having a good time or spending time with family and living life in a happy, fun way. Experience life in the moment and don’t dwell on trivial things that don’t matter.
The reason I had even looked up what women want from men is that I simply wanted to understand that! Thing is, I realized that in order to understand that, I needed to read something written by a woman.
You don’t have to journey alone. Talk to a mentor. It’s confidential and always free. Please fill out the form below so a mentor can get in touch soon to listen and to support you. All fields are required unless otherwise indicated.
Hey! There’s this guy I REALLY like, and I know he is attracted to me as well. The only problem is that he is also attracted to some other girl, and has hundreds of others clamoring to take our places. I need to be the center of his attention, but I don’t know how! Please help me!
Be adaptable in any situation. Men want you to fit in at a fancy party, with beer and pizza on sports night and at a boring work function. And, he wants you to do it with ease and with no complaining. If you think that men fall in love with the “hard to get” women, think again. Not in today’s world. Today men really fall for easy-going gals who can go with the flow.
The solution – honest self-appraisal. It is important for people to know the worth of their contributions in a relationship, as well as the worth of what they desire in return. The two should be roughly equal. This does not have to be an exact tit-for-tat exchange. Nevertheless, the scales should be somewhat balanced to avoid hard feelings and relationship break-down. Relationships that are too one-sided should be avoided. Asking for far more than one is (really) worth should be avoided too.
There’s little doubt that men and women think differently and see the world from two entirely different perspectives. Men expect to be influenced by women when they are in a relationship and they even WANT to be influenced by you, but there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about trying to influence a man if you want to become irresistible to him.
Finally, always look polished. Wear that bright nail polish on your toes – maybe a luminous hot pink, a blazing orange, or a bright torquoise. Put on those beautiful bracelets that give off a pleasant sound when you gesture with your hands. I’m serious… men ache for these little touches of femininity.
Great tips! I have come across many articles that have give all kinds of advices, but none that talk about the aura and owning our space.. these are critical in attracting the right kind of people. You have described everything very clearly and precisely, loved reading your hub! 🙂
I also don’t follow what you mean by ‘seeking a partner of equal value’. The fact that most women value men who are violent, abusive, and dysfunctional thugs—or weak, effeminate metrosexual types—illustrates how little most of them value masculinity at all.
Any one know where I can meet a man like mr. Platts in the Denver area? Lol I’m seriously horrible at going out to “find that guy”. Mainly because I have a job and an almost 2 year old. Men show me their interested but they usually only want one thing.. Any suggestions?? People says men find single mothers attractive but where are these men at???
Completely, personally I feel perfectly fine being feminine/cute and still maintaining my strengths/including career accomplishments and abilities to work hard in a variety of different fields (that may be labeled more or less masculine or feminine)
Not really knowing oneself is most of the time the common mistake of women. we tend to be someone we’re really not because we want to attract some guy. in the end, we don’t get what we want because we were too busy being somebody else in the process.
You can hit all the fine points of our age-old mating dance, but if you don’t pull away from the pack, then he might not ever go in for the approach due to the wall of your protective clan. Obviously, if you are alone you need not worry about this one, but if you and the girls or guy friends are out and you see a young buck checking you out, it might be time to take a stroll, which will invite him into your own personal space.
it’s natural instincts. Men evolved to want to protect/provide because women are physically weaker, and so would have a hard time protecting themselves/kids. Also, Japanese women have jobs, and they still act feminine. And a man would have had to be aggressive and dominant to hunt, and to protect children/women. (who are physically weaker) If a women is all masculine, it makes her less attractive, because that’s not what a man instinctively wants in a woman. Why would a man be attracted to a woman that shows traits of someone with high testosterone? And how would that trigger his protective instincts in any way whatsoever?
13 Secrets To Growing Your Hair Really Long Exactly How To Pick The Best Hair Color For Your Skin The Real Reasons Men Don’t Text Back: The Ultimate “Do’s and Don’ts” Guide To Texting What Do Men Find Attractive: 15 Character Traits That Attract Men To Women 20 Things You Might Be Doing That Are Ruining Your Hair How to Attract a Healthy Relationship
Knee, C. R. (1998). Implicit theories of relationships: Assessment and prediction of romantic relationship initiation, coping, and longevity. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 74, 360–370.
Keeping up a conversation: It would be a blessing if you can keep up a conversation other than just saying “hmmmm”, “k” etc. Please for God’s sake read some books, read the newspaper, contribute to the conversation. We need not Discuss International Taxation, Monetary policy, fiscal policy or Politics, but atleast you should be able to talk about the regular stuff in our life, like Cricket 😉
We have grown so accustomed to meeting others’ standards that we may not know what we want in a relationship. But in learning to love ourselves, we look for partners who will love us in return, and write off those who will bring negativity and judgment into our lives.
Imperfections: Have to stress the point again, because we are so much obsessed with the cover girls that we forget being organic is being sexy. Almost every guy agrees too much makeup is a turn-off. They want to see some natural beauty in you. The mole is absolutely okay, so is the buck teeth. They tend to associate you with your marks and scars, and it makes you uniquely attractive to them and distinguish you from rest of the crowd.
Now, you not being all that emotionally & sexually drawn to the local guy — that could be that he’s just filling the void that you don’t have with your LD Boyfriend. If your local friend was a Hunk, I think you would have slept with him at some point and been going thru a breakup with your LD Boyfriend, etc.
Know when to move forward. This is probably the most important step of them all. Don’t mention sex for a while. Your friends might tease you about it, and ride you for a while about it. But they’ll never have as amazing of a relationship as you, because you are the gentleman.
I agree with the above comment. It does seem like a lot of people are focused on perfection and discard a relationship that could potentially work with some minor adjustments too easily. Related to this is that it also seems people throw the word “compatibility” around as an excuse for breaking off a relationship. But that word by itself is too vague. Compatibility can be issues like wanting kids or not to weekend hobbies. It’s so easy for people to use compatibility to justify getting out of a relationship because it’s not perfect.
► Composure: Men love nothing more than a woman who can handle situations calmly. No erratic behaviour. No cantankerousness. No yelling. No crazy stuff. I am not denying that some men are irrational. However, those irrational people are not attractive. When a person knows that they’re not always right and are willing to reason, the attractiveness quadruples.
Italiano: Conquistare Un Bravo Ragazzo, Español: encontrar a un buen hombre, Português: Encontrar um Bom Pretendente, Русский: найти хорошего мужчину, Deutsch: Einen guten Mann finden, Français: séduire un homme bien, Bahasa Indonesia: Mendapatkan Pria yang Baik, Nederlands: Een goede man vinden, العربية: الحصول على رجل صالح, 中文: 找一个好男友
Talk about how you do not want to rush her and you do not want to make her feel uncomfortable in any way. Tell her that you will wait until she is ready, even if it means waiting years. She’ll appreciate these words.
Don’t be hasty. Lean in slowly and close your eyes. Go almost completely all the way to her lips, and wait for her to meet you there. Don’t go all the way, this might scare her off. Give her some room and time to make the decision. Go about 85-90% of the way.
Doing what you can to be the most attractive version of you possible is only going to increase your options, increase your power, and increase your effectiveness with attracting the person you ultimately want to attract.
Well, hello brake12. It’s true that some women are naturals. The good news is that good habits can be learned with enough commitment. It’s worth the extra effort–for sure!. Also, Aubrey, I thank you for pinning. I’m delighted that you enjoyed the hub.
Fly on the Wall, you are welcome to pay for everyone’s bill. You can pay for mine!! I treat my friends very well, I am just particular about what I want and as a woman, I have the right to determine that.
The first steps to love can get better with practice. Knowing when to give the right glance, smile, or swagger helps too. Try out the tips above. You may just get the attention of that person you are looking for…
The kindle version is only $9, and if this book was sent to the top of the charts on Amazon or on various best selling booklists it would send a massive wake-up call to the culture about men and their opinions and feelings in the dating game rather than Kay Hymowitz’s bullshit “Manning Up” or Hanna Rosin’s even worse “The End of Men.”
Learn how to flirt by paying attention to how you look and portray yourself. Flirting begins with personal appearance and great self esteem. Learn also to manipulate body parts that will grab his attention and keep him interested in you
I understand the instinct to compare yourself to other women and to other people in general. Maybe you see another woman and you think to yourself, “if only I had ….” (insert whatever it is that you wish you could change about yourself that she has).