Although it was a bit more than just a smile, the men who attracted the attention of women did show some similar behaviors. First, like the women, these men also made more eye contact. In addition, though, they also showed more powerful and dominant body language. They took up space, moved around, and touched other men in playful and leading (non-sexual) ways. Essentially, the guys who looked at the women, joked around with other men, and were comfortable in their own space, got the women’s attention.
[…] For the male perspective on turn-ons and turn-offs, written by three of my favorite male dating bloggers (Jackie Summers, The Urban Dater, Jeffrey Platts and Fishy) see this collaborative post by Kelly Seal. […]
► Joie de vivre / Gioia di vivere / Lebensfreude: A happy woman is an amazing sight to see. The character trait of being happy is incredibly attractive. People in general are put off by melancholy and angst. A happy person is an attractive person because people want to be around them. This is true for both men and women.
As a general rule of thumb, if your walk has become a waddle, you’ve gone too far. If you have no other problems and yet walking or standing hurts your joints or back, you may be too fat to be attractive to most men (and nobody is saying you have to be).
I would also suggest developing an additional “social” personal hobby. Depending on your current interests, perhaps there are some aspects of your hobbies now that could be more social (e.g. interest groups, meet-ups, conventions, etc.). That can be a good way to practice being more social and expand your friendship network. Perhaps you will find love that way. Or perhaps, you will make a good friend who will introduce you to his sister, cousin, girlfriend’s friend, etc. Networking works just as well in love as it does in business. A good referral goes a long way too 🙂
Personality and a sense of humor are pretty huge to me and, I imagine, every Tom, Dick and Harriet out there. If a girl can make me laugh that’s really a great start. I also am drawn to women that have a personality that commands attention; you know she’s in a room, hard to ignore, the personality is warm and welcoming. She gets attention without really trying, to me, that’s incredibly sexy.
You may think the root of this is about money, but it’s really linked to something much deeper. It’s about someone else’s limitations on what they think they cannot have—or do not deserve. It really is about how much you feel you are worth. It is about how much you feel you deserve.
She has a glow. Hard to describe this, but it’s something you can just feel when you see it. You can tell that she’s connected to her heart and is okay with sharing her love with the world. If a guy approached her and she wasn’t interested, she would be honest, yet have respect and compassion for his courage to come up talk to her.
Men have always been the more aggressive sex in the human species. They’re usually the ones who spread their legs wider, stand tall and swell their chest up while trying to appear threatening all the time, more so when they’re in an argument or when they meet someone they see as a threat in any manner.
Great advice. For me the problem is posture. I have poor posture because I have been sick most of the winter and lost a lot of muscle. I am going to have to figure out which exercises will fix my posture!
Though I agree with Serena over the article. I will say… we as Americans are failing to appreciate our gender differences. Just read an article which may or may not be true that American men have 40% average less testosterone than 50 years ago.
Derek Maak has been writing about relationships for as long as he can remember. He hopes to bring more passion, romance, intimacy, desire, and FUN to every interaction with your loved one. Connect with Derek on Twitter, Facebook, and Google +.
Anyway, again, you were cheating — even with a guy who you’re not all that sexually attracted to. There’s never an attraction measuring stick to determine whether it’s cheating or not. You wouldn’t have wanted the same situation on your LD Boyfriend’s end. At all.
“This works, period. No sugar-coating, no gimmicks, no cheesy lines: Matt’s advice is practical, sometimes blunt, and most importantly, effective. You WILL get the guy after reading this, end of story!” (Louise Roe, fashion journalist, TV host)
Plus, nothing makes a man feel worse than to feel stuck in a problem he just can’t solve so if you’re unhappy too often, at some level, he’s failed and he will try to distance himself from feeling like a failure. By contrast, nothing makes a man feel successful like you when you are happy — which is why a positive, happy and radiant woman is so appealing.
“Write down all the traits of the type of person you have liked, are attracted to or have dated, and whittle it down to 10 qualities,” says Whitney Casey, author of The Man Plan. When picking guys in the new year, you can keep three of those 10 qualities—for the other seven, go for different types of traits. “Any time you’re on a date and you notice that there are more than three common traits from your list, you don’t give it another date. Stop right there.”
If you accept that a partner will come with problems, one approach is to consider that when choosing a partner you are also choosing a set of problems. Of course you should expect your partner to grow and some of these problems to be minimized or handled but partners need to accept the good and the bad, and work with that. In a positive way!
It’s because it’s a difficult process if your social circle is really thin. A guy has to face rejection. He has to get comfortable with it. When a guy is 100% comfortable, and has no hesitation about the concept of rejection — he has no problem with the singles/dating scene. Of course, getting to that point is not easy.
Who are you? How would you define yourself? We are who we are because of our socioeconomic status, the people around us, and other influences we’ve had in our lifetime. A lucky few may have had the opportunity to be influenced by the perfect examples, while most of us have to change to become better individuals. Or worse, we never get to become better individuals or achieve the full potential that’s within us because we’re convinced we’re all perfect already. [Read: 25 life-changing lessons you need to learn to perfect your life]
A recent study of romantic comedies unearthed another emotional surprise. Sure, men reported enjoying sappy movies less than women do—the term chick flicks is not on trial here—but that’s very different from concluding that men don’t like them at all. Psychologist Richard Jackson Harris of Kansas State University found that actual men liked seeing a romantic comedy on a date much more than women thought “most men” would.
You can hit all the fine points of our age-old mating dance, but if you don’t pull away from the pack, then he might not ever go in for the approach due to the wall of your protective clan. Obviously, if you are alone you need not worry about this one, but if you and the girls or guy friends are out and you see a young buck checking you out, it might be time to take a stroll, which will invite him into your own personal space.
Be romantic about it. She won’t like it if her first time is in a car or in a bathroom at the movies. Her house would be the best. She’ll feel comfortable with her surroundings. Light a few candles to set the mood.
Negativity. Nothing drains me more than a woman who is perpetually negative, with a bad attitude. One of my exes was so keen to rag on her co-workers; it was the bulk of what we’d talk about. She would make fun of these people, if she wasn’t doing that she was worried about how someone wronged her at work… Man, I couldn’t deal. When she would come by, she’d immediately hop into bed and not for any “bounce house” antics either. You don’t realize how much a negative person drains from you until you’ve kicked them to the curb!
However, some people don’t pick such balanced relationships. Some repeatedly sell themselves short, giving way more than they get. In the end, these people often feel cheated, unappreciated, and used. Others repeatedly over-estimate their worth, asking for too much. They too end up feeling frustrated, when no one will meet their unrealistic expectations. Thus, both under-valuing and over-valuing one’s self leads to repeated problems in love.
I just think there is a population that doesn’t see how they present themselves. Why would I want to spend time with a jerk who is looking for a sugar mama? Being a jerk who has misogynistic tendencies shouldn’t be attractive to ANYBODY.
A good relationship is like a dance. It requires two people giving their all and learning the steps to work with each other so they don’t crush a lot of toes. And like a good dance, there are steps you can take in your relationship to help make it flow smoothly, and keep you from stepping all over your partner by accident.
Kindness: Men are more attracted to people who are good to them. Most men have to fight or work for everything they get. Beauty is subjective. Show up one day and hand him a plate of cookies, and you’ll suddenly be a lot prettier to that guy. He will also be thinking about those cookies for years. It’s not a common thing.
Men want to feel manly and significant. They want to provide for you, it’s just their nature to be that way. However, a man will only want to give to a woman who can happily receive what he has to offer, not one who is going to make unnecessary demands in order to feel good about herself and secure in the relationship. A woman who tries to get this assurance from the outside will always be unsatisfied and there is nothing more unappealing to a man than an unhappy woman.
Men can sense your vibe and you don’t have to say anything to make it come across; in fact, the less you “try” to “prove” what a good mood you are in and the more you focus on actually being in a good mood, the better off you will be.